Author: Joseph Belluck
Daughter & Father Keep Hope Alive During Fight Against Mesothelioma
Some individuals are just positive people; it’s how they are! No matter what is thrown at them or what comes their way, they have the ability to make the best of things. This, in turn, helps those around them to be optimistic, too.
My Dad was one of those people. Many individuals ask me how my family stayed so upbeat (for the most part) during our experience with mesothelioma. The simple answer was, “Dad.” When the person who has been diagnosed with this disease is the one reassuring everyone else that things will be ok, it’s hard to believe otherwise. This is not to say that I didn’t have my moments, but there was more light in my days than I expected during this time.
Some may think that I was naïve to think this way, but it was how I chose to handle it. I believe that attitude can have a direct effect on outcome, so why not think the best! Even on the days when I felt the most sadness and anxiety about Dad’s illness, he would always tell me that he would be ok. God would take care of him and all of us as well.
Going through life thinking the worst must be exhausting. Life is a challenge, bringing with it ups and downs that you may never be prepared for. But we are also meant to make the best of what we are given. Dad inspired me to always look for the best in every situation and it has truly changed my entire outlook on the world. There is inherent good in people, there is hope when all seems dark, and there is love where you couldn’t imagine it could ever be found. Never give up hope, God will always be there!
Writing About Mesothelioma & Family’s Journey
People often ask me, “Why do you keep writing and working for a cure for mesothelioma, even though your Dad is no longer here?” Continuing to work for and with the mesothelioma community is not even a question for me. I do it because it matters.
My Dad is no longer with us, it’s true, but the memories he left me and the impact he had on my life are still vibrant. I do this so that his struggle will not have been in vain. He meant something to so many people, and I want his story to inspire others to not give up and have strong faith in God.
I write because I hope that my family’s journey can bring comfort to someone in need. I hope that if there is a person struggling or looking for an answer, they can find some respite in what we went through. Sure, we went through a hard time, but maybe we can help somebody from going through the troubles that we did.
I work because mesothelioma is already an orphan disease. Why should I orphan it as well? It is because people don’t talk about it that this cancer has become so little-known. They say that knowledge is power. I want to bring about as much awareness as I can to highlight the dangers of asbestos and to work to prevent one more person from suffering from this disease.
It matters. This cause, so close to my heart, that took my beloved father from me, matters. You matter. Your loved one matters. Your story matters. Never forget that, and never stop fighting.
Remembering Dad on His Birthday After Losing to Mesothelioma
I write this on what would have been my father’s 61st birthday. I write this with a broken heart and tear-stained cheeks. I write this as a daughter who lost her hero to the terrible clutches of mesothelioma.
Normally, Dad’s birthday would have been full of fun. Phone calls, visits, food, and a game with my great aunt (who spent her wedding anniversary waiting for him to be born) to see who would call to give their well wishes first! Now, in a stark, different reality, I find myself alone with my thoughts, imagining what today would have been like.
I imagine that today would have been spent with family as usual, but with the beautiful addition of his two-year-old granddaughter. The laughter that always accompanied time spent with my Dad would have been amplified with him enjoying her antics and singing our song, “You Are My Sunshine.”
Today should have been a day of celebrating Dad’s life with him present, not lovingly remembering him in the past. Thankfully, I have so many beautiful memories with him to always carry with me, but I will always mourn for those left unmade. Empty chairs, songs without a voice, and hearts broken, all because of mesothelioma.
Mary Hesdorffer Moves on from Mesothelioma Applied Research Foundation
Recently, I received a letter in the mail from Mary Hesdorffer, Executive Director of the Mesothelioma Applied Research Foundation.
In it, she announced her upcoming retirement. Instantly, I felt a mix of emotions. I am so happy for her to begin this new chapter in her life but, at the same time, sad that she will be stepping down. She assured us of her continued dedication and involvement to the mesothelioma community, and we are certainly glad to hear that.
Mary was one of the first people I spoke with when we were told of my Dad’s diagnosis. She was not only a wealth of knowledge, but a listening ear as I voiced my confusion and concerns.
Over the years, she has remained in close contact, checking in at pivotal points in my father’s treatment and progression, and as a friend.
I know that there are countless others who can share my same story of Mary’s compassionate, caring nature that comes effortlessly to her.
She has been a mentor to many and helped patients and their families through the most trying times in their lives.
I hope that this amazing woman knows how much she means to my family, and I know I speak on behalf of everyone she has interacted with that she will be missed, but we wish her all the best.
You have been an inspiration, Mary, and we promise to continue the work you’ve done to ensure that we find a cure for mesothelioma, once and for all.
Enjoy the Beauty of Easter Season
The Easter season is upon us once again, and with it comes a time of hope, beauty, and renewed faith. Now is a wonderful time to sit and reflect on what this time can mean to someone, and their family, battling mesothelioma.
It is a great time to look around you and count your many blessings. Take a look at your loved ones and be sure to recognize their love for you as well. The weather is turning warmer; spend some time outside and look at God’s beautiful creation!
It is so important to take the time to realize that families who are faced with a mesothelioma diagnosis are still very real people. They should never be defined by this disease, nor should they be treated differently. Allow yourself to be close to them, invite them to take a walk or go for a drive in the warmth of nature. Ask them if they would like some company, but always let them dictate the length of the visit; they may be tired, or they may feel like chatting for hours!
New life abounds in so many ways at this season of the year; remember that in every season of life, there is beauty to be found.
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