Author: Joseph Belluck
Resolve to Support the Mesothelioma Community in 2015
The new year inevitably brings with it New Year’s resolutions. Some people resolve to help others – what a great idea! Here are five ways that you can help the mesothelioma community, advocating for patients and their families, and honoring those who have lost their fight.
- Hold a fundraiser! It can be anything from a collection day to a 5k walk and run; trust me, it doesn’t have to be anything elaborate. Hosting an event raises both awareness and funds for mesothelioma research and support.
- Attend a conference! Each year, the Mesothelioma Applied Research Foundation holds a conference where personal stories, new research information, and general knowledge is shared. This is a great way to connect with others and to learn more about the disease that you can share.
- Talk to people! Tell your story. Don’t be afraid or embarrassed to let people know how mesothelioma has impacted your life. This can encourage them to get involved and help the cause as well.
- Write to your local representatives. Find out who your local representative is and write to them, asking for stricter laws regarding asbestos – ask for it to be made illegal as it is in many other countries. Talk to your friends and relatives and urge them to do the same.
- Pray! Prayer is powerful – never underestimate it. Keep those battling this disease and those close to them in your prayers. It means more to them than you know.
Enjoy 2015! Let’s make this the year where a cure is found and this awful cancer can be eradicated forever!
Give Up the Doubting to Find Peace
My father lost his battle with mesothelioma on October 15, 2013. When he passed away, I instantly started thinking about what more I could have done to help him. Was there another treatment we didn’t know about? Did he need something that we weren’t able to give him? After a long time, I found peace in knowing that we honestly did everything that we could and that Dad knew and appreciated that. Finding a sense of forgiveness in myself took some time.
It’s easy to place blame on yourself when you lose somebody you love to cancer, or wonder whether you could have done more to help them. Could I have recognized the symptoms sooner? Did I do enough research? Was the treatment enough or the right one? Did I do everything in my power to prevent losing him?
Unfortunately, these questions can cause you a lot of pain and heartache, but I think that the “what-ifs” are a natural reaction and part of grief. However, the wondering won’t get you anywhere. It will take time, but it’s important to realize that your love and support were enough for your loved one.
In my Dad’s case, all he wanted was for us to spend time together and to know how much he loved us. We never doubted that love for one second and we know that he felt ours in return. These are the important thoughts and memories that will allow you to eventually look back with a smile and know that your love carried them through and that they will never be forgotten.
Know more about Mesothelioma and how you can deal with it.
Turn Gossip into an Opportunity to Advocate for Mesothelioma Patients
People talk. It’s what we do. We discuss the weather, current events, and even each other. That’s where things can start to get out of control. An innocent conversation can spiral into a story that is far from the truth. People feel that they have the right to share details that may have been told in confidence. But that information can be misinterpreted and gossip begins to run rampant.
Since my Dad’s battle with mesothelioma, I have found myself to be fiercely protective of the ins and outs of my life, only sharing details with close family members and friends. Since mesothelioma is such a rare disease, the details of this ailment lends itself to confusion; however, hearing things about yourself and your family that simply aren’t true is a painful experience, and one that should never happen.
Words have the power to build up and to tear down. They can mend relationships or break them apart. We need to be increasingly mindful of the power of words, especially in such sensitive situations as a medical diagnosis.
If you find yourself in a situation where information about you or your loved one has been misconstrued, do your best to see it as an opportunity to educate and advocate. Maybe this is a chance to share your true story that could eventually help someone else. This could be the eye-opener that causes someone to ponder the dangers of asbestos. Use this unfortunate event as a catalyst for change.
Don’t Forget the Spirit of Christmas and the Hope It Brings
It’s hard to believe that 2014 is already coming to a close. This year saw my first full year without my Dad. As we come to the Christmas season, it is, once again, a time to reflect on the memories and love that he left behind.
Last year, the pain of losing my father was excruciatingly fresh. I was still in shock and unsure about how I would carry on without having him here with me. Now, the pain still remains and I often question how it is possible to live a “normal” life after losing Dad, but this year I realize that I have had some time to reflect on the entire journey that he had with mesothelioma.
Dad’s mesothelioma story is one of sadness, followed by a miracle and joy. It is a tale riddled with highs and lows, but always full of love and hope. This love and hope is what Christmas is all about. As we celebrate the birth of Jesus, it is important to also hold our loved ones close and remember all of the good that is in this world. It is easy to get caught up in the commercial side of the season, but remember the true reason.
Dad was so much more than this terrible disease. He embodied the Christmas spirit every day of his life. Spreading happiness, being generous, and loving with his whole heart, my father lived this message. Enjoy this beautiful time of year and remember that Jesus is the reason for the season. Merry Christmas!
Know more about Mesothelioma and how you can deal with it.
Daughter Reflects on the Memories With Her Father Lost to Mesothelioma
A few short weeks ago, my husband and I were blessed to become parents to a healthy and beautiful baby girl. It’s amazing the love that a parent feels for a child (and a child for a parent, for that matter). A mother and father will do anything they can to protect their little one. This made me think about the relationship I had with my Dad and how it impacted his journey with mesothelioma.
Dad and I had a very close relationship; I always knew that I could talk to him about anything. His kindness and amazing ability to give advice always amazed me. When he was diagnosed, we talked about the disease and what the next steps were. He talked about everything being in God’s hands and that we needed to put all our trust in Him. Once he was free of the disease, he told me that prior to this milestone, he felt awful. We discussed how his chemotherapy treatment made him feel – it seemed like we mulled everything over.
As difficult as it may seem, he even took the time to discuss his final wishes.
Now, I wonder if he was holding back to protect me. Did he really tell me everything, or did he keep a little in to keep me from worrying like I always do? Was he feeling as good as he said, or did he put on a braver face for my benefit? I guess these are questions that I will never know the answer to, but regardless, even if he did hold back, I know that it was done out of pure love.
I miss my Dad every single moment of the day, but I take comfort in knowing, and now understanding, the amount of love that he had for me and my family. I pray that I can be half the parent that he was… then, I’ll be doing pretty great.
Know more about Mesothelioma and how you can deal with it.
Free Mesothelioma Patient & Treatment Guide
We’d like to offer you our in-depth guide, “A Patient’s Guide to Mesothelioma,” absolutely free of charge.
It contains a wealth of information and resources to help you better understand the condition, choose (and afford) appropriate treatment, and exercise your legal right to compensation.
Download Now